Books with author DOUGLAS JAMES

Dan Starkey reads this brand new novel based on a storyline by Douglas Adams.The Doctor promised Romana the end of the universe, so she’s less than impressed when what she gets is a cricket match. But then the award ceremony is interrupted by eleven figures in white uniforms and peaked skull helmets, wielding bat-shaped weapons that fire lethal bolts of light into the screaming crowd. The Krikkitmen are back.Millions of years ago, the people of Krikkit learned they were not alone in the universe, and promptly launched a xenophobic crusade to wipe out all other life-forms. After a long and bloody conflict, the Time Lords imprisoned Krikkit within an envelope of Slow Time, a prison that could only be opened with the Wicket Gate key, a device that resembles – to human eyes, at least – an oversized set of cricket stumps…From Earth to Gallifrey, from Bethselamin to Devalin, from Krikkit to Mareeve II to the far edge of infinity, the Doctor and Romana are tugged into a pan-galactic conga with fate as they rush to stop the Krikkitmen gaining all five pieces of the key. If they fail, the entire cosmos faces a fiery retribution that will leave nothing but ashes… Duration: 9 hours 40 mins approx.

In a land of legends and sorcery, Shepard is unremarkable. Although he is the youngest of three heirs to the throne, no one respects those without magic, royalty or not.Frustrated and determined to prove his worth, Shepard sets out to discover abilities of his own, only to find he gets far more than he bargained for. His power flares out of control, haunting him with visions of destruction. Then they begin to come true.In a bid to use his powers to reverse what has been done, Shepard’s dangerous gift is exposed. Everything is at stake unless the young prince finds a way to alter what he’s set into motion. But that means diving even deeper into the madness of his gift. Deeper into the poison…Can Shepard save his land without losing himself in the process?

Enlightening”, “funny,” “relatable,” “too true,” “laugh-out-loud funny,” and “right on the mark,” are some of the ways people describe the humor of author and podcast host Jay Douglas.Whether he's talking about the ridiculous goings-on in every day life (like the sudden epidemic of efficiency in government offices) or offering helpful advice (like the importance of knowing the words to *A Teddy Bear's Picnic* if you're serious about pub quizzes) this book has many answers to some of life's more pressing and elusive questions. For exampleQ: What is the role of the DMV in society?A: Without our government we, the people, would be responsible for doing some pretty disgusting jobs.In fact, some of these jobs are so disgusting that the framers of the Constitution were scared they would be stuck with them. So, the framers wrote the 10th Amendment and, in the words of many distinguished Constitutional scholars, foisted these jobs off on the states.That is why the Federal government gets to play video games with real airplanes while the states get to remove giant hair balls from sewer pipes.States also have the job of reminding you that you are getting old.Since no self-respecting state legislator, and I've asked both of them, would vote for a law called the "Tell People They Are Getting Old Act," states meet this obligation with the cleverly named "Driver's License Renewal Act.”Q: Why do stores have self-checkout aisles?A: A local home improvement warehouse (I can't mention the name, but you would immediately recognize it, mainly because it's printed on everyone's orange aprons) has found a way to spare us men the agony of home repair.All we need to do is take our wives shopping with us and make sure we pay in the self-service checkout line.This amazing advance in retail science is a way for highly-placed corporate executives to assure other highly-placed corporate executives that their company is a happening, high-tech, cutting-edge business that sells exciting products like claw hammers, whose designs haven't changed since the invention of hair.Q: Why are airports so frustrating?A: Despite all its vastness, it is a matter of fact, as indisputable as the lips on a chicken, that there is one point in the universe where everybody winds up.And that point is in an airport, in front of, next to or underneath some sign.As notable a fellow as Einstein took time to point out the problem of unchecked signage in a footnote to his theory of relativity. He wrote, "Man cannot travel faster than the speed of light because there will always be a sign someplace he will stop to read.(Einstein was also first to propose the theory of six degrees of separation, which states, "In any airport you will always be separated from where you want to be by at least six people all reading the same sign.) Each story takes only a few minutes to read (but give yourself a little extra time to stop laughing), and is a perfect antidote for those moments of melancholy that follow on the heels of reading the morning's news.In e-book format, the book is discrete (from a distance it is impossible to tell it apart from *Lord of the Flies*). All words in the book are waterproof and can be safely taken into the bathroom (your ebook reader, however, may have other ideas).

Ever wonder what living in a near-perfect world would be like? Bible prophecy promises just such a coming world! The Millennium will be One-thousand years of an Eden-like Planet Earth, ruled by Jesus Christ, the King of Kings!Adam Beam, a young boy, and his sister, Zonia, live in a future time, born in an era of a beautiful, Utopian world. The children live in Glorania, the capital city of New Eden, where the Great King rules an almost perfect planet. They face no dangers in this new world. Adam’s pet, Toby, for example, is a Siberian tiger weighing 1,000 pounds!Adam, Zonia, and Toby go through a “Dream Door” into the past, as part of Adam’s “Explore Time” adventure, the method by which children of New Eden Time learn history. They pass in and out of Dream Doors by means of the “Dream Doodler”, a fantastic instrument that can draw a spectacularly beautiful picture in midair. The children can jump into the picture they draw, to take them wherever they want to go.Exciting, wonderful adventures await. Join them in their quest to find Adam’s Apples!Help get out the message that, for Christians, the future is not gloom and doom, but is God-Guaranteed to be gloriously splendiferous!

The Millennial Kingdom is a wonderous time to be born into. The world is at peace and has become like the Garden of Eden; beautiful, exciting, and ruled by the Great King Himself who sits on His throne in the golden-street city of Glorania. In such a perfect place, who would expect thieves to prowl at night? It’s those two fumblers again, Lester Mudd and Castor Grout. This time the troublemakers intend to steal a special gift entrusted to Adam Beam by the Great King. Luckily, Adam is startled awake during the burglary. Lester and Castor panic and escape through a carelessly drawn Dream Door, accidentally landing on Noah’s Ark at the time of the Great Flood. It doesn’t take Adam long to figure out where the thieves have gone. At once Adam, his sister Zonia, and their pet Siberian Tiger Toby are in hot pursuit to recover the stolen treasure, only to learn that the gift has fallen into the raging flood waters and is permanently lost. Well, maybe not permanently. Adam has an idea how to find the precious gift, but it will take some clever Dream Doodling, the help of Noah and his family, a navy of friendly sea creatures, and . . . a submarine Dream Doodled from the far future. Naturally, the evil Evols intend to do all within their power to stop Adam from completing his mission.

The line between prophecy and prison.Morrigan wakes in the mysterious land of Lhiminal after a brush with death, leaving her with no recollection of her life before. As her past unravels, Morrigan finds that she is the last of the Stoneborn, a rank of powerful warriors destined to purge the realm of its Dark King, Lysander.The young warrior grows unsettled at the thought that her path has already been laid out for her. She doesn’t want a life filled with conflict and death, but she also doesn’t seem to have a say. Determined to break free from destiny, Morrigan tries time and again to deny her purpose.However, Lysander draws closer with her every hesitation, wielding an ancient and powerful magic capable of tearing Lhiminal apart. And the Dark King is hellbent on using it to destroy the last Stoneborn.Will Morrigan accept her fate in order to survive?“I didn’t want to kill her. But she wouldn’t stop, so neither could I…”Scroll up and one-click now!

The Prōdigium is a coming of age, young adult novel whose main character, a sixteen year old boy, is born with a unique genetic code that makes him a valuable commodity in a dystopian society. The dystopian setting is not the typical apocalyptic future, but rather an America governed by new amendments brought on by the loss of natural resources, declining international influence, and societal dysfunction. The protagonist must traverse the difficulties of being in a single parent household, the complexities of emerging love, the uncertainties of his gift, and the dangers of a rich and powerful antagonist.

Victory at a most dire price.After playing her part to fulfill a legend, Morrigan now struggles to control the all-powerful magic within her, certain that the burden of obtaining it will ease with time.But there is none left. Little does she know; a curse now stirs beneath the surface of her kingdom.In the obsession to obtain a magic that controls life, Morrigan has unknowingly created an enemy made of death. A wretched hunger that can only be satisfied with her undoing.Can the Stoneborn Queen harness her powers before it’s too late?

Amid the golden era of Dutch art, Clara has a passion for painting and life. But the two don't always mix. Her father is long overdue from Italy with the latest paint recipes, but lies, famous art, rare tulips, and sugary girls crowd Clara's search for her father. Someone knows where he might be, but it will cost more than Clara's talents to find out. This short children's novel by Douglas Jones is entertaining and allows kids to enter into another time period with likeable and exemplary characters. A real treat for young readers!